Everyone needs calm, strict enforcement of rules. If we don’t get punished to a point of pain, we become self-royal brats who think the world has appointed us the new ruling bloodline. Punishment is different from rage and anger.
Some people refused to give calm, sober, plain punishment to quickly deter children from destructive behavior later in life. These people have no mercy, no matter how much they claim to. They neither have mercy on the society, which criminals destroy, nor on those criminals who live unhappy lives. The main reason most criminals are criminals is because they weren’t disciplined to be good and happy early in life.
In the very early years, good parents swat with the hand on their child’s bear bottom, leaving no mark or injury, only some redness that passes after thirty minutes and a sting to teach the child about controlling personal choices. That’s it. There is no need for rage or hateful words, leather whips or beating with a belt. Swift punishment, enforced with a rigorous work ethic, in the very earliest years of disobedience will raise a child to become an adult who is safe and sober. Don’t wait or argue. Spanking through clothing is either too light and becomes a joke or must cause bruising to have any pain, so don’t do that either. If disciplined correctly once a child can walk and understand “obedience”, psychological punishments—like “time out”, writing sentences, or lost privileges—will be effective in the later years of childhood.
Having Asperger or ADD is not misbehavior, but it isn’t an excuse either. Everyone has a different psychology and no parent becomes an expert merely by having a baby. Understanding our different frames of mind and learning styles takes time and experience. Talk to someone who works with children and volunteer in a nursery during junior high and high school.
Whether you are a parent or not is beside the point. Society at wide derives its discipline from childhood. Discipline merely instills self-discipline. The key is to remain calm and happy, forgetting the punishment the instant it has been served. “Abuse” comes from rage and forced love. Love and discipline use open hands.