Tag: needverse

280 – Leading as Dominators of Space

Every space must have a governing dominator. This is a law of physics, firstly in gravity. The larger, denser mass will be the primary directing force within its range.

Of course all mass generates its own gravitational force, the smaller masses making impacts of their own. The moon changes Earth’s tides while Earth dictates the moon’s course around the sun. The greater forces are dominant. The moon is not greater than Earth, but it is greater than Earth’s oceans and thus makes it’s lesser—but nonetheless important—presence known on Earth.

We all make a difference, even in absence. When the loudest dominator doesn’t speak it creates loud silence. Absentee parents wreak passive destruction in their children’s lives. One of the handful of hard, vital lessons of life we each must learn is that everyone can and is dominated by something else in some way. Another lesson is that, while all factory workers are replaceable, no family member can ever be replaced. We only learn these vital life lessons through experience. Shareholders and employees of Apple learned the lessons of dominance and replacement twice.

If you don’t dominate your own space, in magnitude of your own capacity and strength, then you do injustice to the universe. Earth’s oceans need the moon as do the people of Earth need the tides to flow. Remember the riddle of the 500 pound gorilla: Where does he sit? Anywhere he wants.

Keep your space in order, your greaters in check, and your lessers in line. Don’t let your space dominate you.

The big, harry monster of the hill does whatever he wants whenever he wants. He generally doesn’t concern himself with matters of smaller critters inhabiting and roaming about. But, if squirrels quarrel and make a ruckus, he’ll have a thing or to to say about it. Thus the hairy monster’s prerogatives keep the peace of local squirreldom. If he abuses the squirrels, they will either flee and give him no company or they will gang up on him because squirrels have their own prerogatives too.

Never disrespect others in your space. Respect yourself as everyone else. Never oppress, but always dominate your own space at your own level.

279 – Lifestyle Plagiarism

Be original. Never repeat what has already been said as if it is your own, new idea.

People are unique. God made us that way. Insanity, however, bears consistent, predictable, and recognizable patterns. Healthy humans can never be fully understood; when we become all too easy to predict, somewhere we have gone mad.

When the books already written and debates already exhausted become our own repeating words, round and round again, life begins to deteriorate. Look at the Christian and Atheist having a “conversation”, each spouting ideas long published by more educated men than they. Their argument never ends and neither is satisfied. It would be better for either to say, “Books have already been written to satisfy these queries. What original ideas can we bring, if any?” Eventually, both will develop deep inner questions since neither one defends his own ideas.

Once an idea has been said, move one. Once an answer has been given, don’t ask the question afterward. When others ask you questions you already answered, say so rather than repeating yourself—rather than plagiarizing yourself. Know when all room for new ideas and new work has been filled, then end discussion so everyone can go about their separate ways, moving on to what good things they might begin next.

People who think their inner and outer struggles are unique easily become depressed. Everyone would do well to recognize a boilerplate thought life. The easiest way to recognize boilerplate publishing is to write frequently and with originality. If your life is not original, you will chase other unoriginality, trying to conform yourself to “be like others” in order to be liked by others. Living such a mimicking so-called “lifestyle” makes no one happy nor escapes life’s vicious cycles.

Study mental illnesses as often as you study history. Watch for repetition because failure and insanity are the most skilled at unoriginality. The leader who convinces his society to conform is himself insane and his society adopts culture-wide insanity by so conforming. Never trust a teacher whose pupils repeat the same answers. Never entertain inquisitive minds who ask answered questions. Quit once your work is finished, lest you over-stay your keep and repeat failure.

276 – Leading as Directors

Letting children run wild does them no good. It never does anyone any good, no matter how old we get. Allowing someone to ignore the boundary lines and break important rules not only harms other people, it harms the person breaking those rules and crossing those boundaries.

The damage of being allowed to live without boundaries occurs on multiple levels. It “enables” bad behavior to continue by “sending the wrong message”. An athlete who can’t play within regulation lacks skill. Little, cute Johnny may seem adorable to the in-laws while he fumbles around with the soccer ball at 7 years old, but unless he focuses his efforts he’ll grow up to be inept rather than a starter athlete appreciated by his teammates and adored by the crowd.

Receiving direction feels constricting at first, but it eventually empowers, like the focused light of a laser or magnifying glass.

Constriction and control is not an end in itself. Helen Keller was wild, unrestrained, and insufferable as a child, until a tutor was able to teach her the concept of meaning. She needed direction, but it had to be coupled with understanding. She had unusual obstacles that needed to be overcome first, but most of us don’t have the luxury of that excuse. Boundaries still must be enforced, usually without as much patience as an unusual “Keller” case requires.

Blowing the whistle when the ball goes OB helps the learning athlete understand gravity, how the world works, the flow of the wind, and what happens in the game. For rookies unable to stay in bounds, remove the lines from the court so the rookies don’t learn to ignore them. Parents of children who grow to be respected as adults will say to the five year old, “Oops, it went over the line. So, it’s my ball now. Tough luck.” That child will learn quickly to be awesome and other parents will never figure out why, but they will always be jealous. Good leaders kindly do the same with everyone, with everything, everywhere.

Learning to color inside the lines is about more than “neatness” and “organization”; it may not even hurt anyone; but staying within the lines proves skill.

275 – Do or Die

Our moments of greatest bravery come when we face the truth in front of us: that if we act, then we risk failure, but if we don’t act, then we guarantee failure. Immature human nature drives us to negotiate and argue with this truth, thinking to persuade the universe to change the options, telling ourselves, “Maybe if we don’t act, we will find some way to guarantee a lesser life, but life nonetheless.”

Heroes step out and take great risks, in the face of doubts and jeers, not for their own fame, but because someone else is in need. That other person depends on the hero coming through, but so does the hero depend on that other person being there. Both of them work as a kind of team and unless everyone goes all out, risks everything, and gives it their all, everything will fall apart.

You can only take risks as big as the difference you know you can make. You will make a bigger difference the more you value yourself and you will value yourself the more you know how much God values you. The more you recognize how much God values you, the more you can trust Him, the more you can trust that He will work out your circumstances.

Heroic choices can’t be made when safe outcomes are guaranteed. The hero determines to make everything work out for everyone else, whether or not things work out for the hero’s own safety. The hero doesn’t leap blindly, but only when he knows the task is within his skill. Heroes are chosen in the days of danger, but they are made over the long term, in the days of practice and preparation, gaining skill, and learning one’s own limits.

Esther’s story illustrates the heroin’s path: taking action to save others despite her own risk. A year of preparation to become queen, now she had a choice. Her people, Israel, faced extinction and she faced death if she brought a frivolous matter before the king. “If I die, I die,” she said, knowing that the words of her uncle were true—that God may have made her queen, “for such a time as this.”

274 – What to Change, When to Change

When you first walk into a new situation, don’t rush to repair every flaw you find. There could be a very good reason things are done how they are. Even if things need to change, you wouldn’t know the deep reasons why or how at first glance, or second or fifth glance. It takes time to understand things older than we are.

And yet, when you have been in a situation for a good, long while and a newcomer shows up, don’t be quick to silence the complaints about your old ways. Old and new wine need old and new wine skins, respectively. But, humanity is greater than wine and its skin. As much as we can, it demonstrates our maturity and strength to embrace the new, no matter how old we get.

We show our potential when we embrace both long-standing traditions and the ongoing need to climb, grow, and improve. Tradition and invention form a crossroads of two-way streets. This crossroads hosts heavy traffic and the only things that always deserve to have things their way all the time are the four signs that read “STOP”.

Societies break down when older and younger generations are at odds. The greater burden falls on the generation that has lived more years with which anyone can seek wisdom; the more mature generation is whichever of the two that chooses to do the more mature thing first. While any conflict always rests its blame at the older and should-be more responsible leaders, any conflict between generations is a threat to an entire society. This, unfortunately describes most societies today.

There cannot be reconciliation between older and younger generations as long as we think that the only right age happens to be whatever age happens to be our own. Thriving requires that we embrace both the young ways and the old.

So, in your own working sphere, embrace both. You have room to improve, just like everyone else. Enjoy hearing, seeing, and tolerating complaints about your problems as much as you enjoy witnessing problems that you can’t yet fix. We can’t help any situation that we don’t already love. Wanting tomorrow doesn’t require hating yesterday. So, enjoy today.

273 – Gauge & Tier Before Judging

A cheat-proof indication of adulthood maturity is the ability to be patient with anyone younger. Things about others that irritate us most are often most true of ourselves. God puts irritating people in our lives because mirrors are useful.

One of the biggest mistakes in life is thinking one is ready to become a parent. When you make that mistake, you’ll probably have children who will be sure to tell you specifically how mistaken you were. Parents are only irritated about their teenagers by things they haven’t outgrown themselves; the only difference is in the price of the toys they quibble over. But, parent or not, never judge the younger generation by your own standards.

Sometimes younger generations don’t know as much as older generations because they are still learning. A teen driving for the first time might take the long way home because it’s the only way he knows. That’s nothing to be angry about, even if it made him late. An adult who knows more should tell the teen to arrive at a time one hour earlier than actually needed—and make sure the teen never knows why. Have some fun news waiting, happily jest about not being ready yet, be smart enough to be flexible enough because the adult is supposed to be older and smarter.

Sometimes younger generations know more than older generations because of advances in technology and science. So, when young people do things in ways that seem wrong to older generations, it is the older generations’ responsibility to recognize the improvement and welcome it. Don’t become that old fart who can’t get out of the way of those who will continue all of his good progress after he bites the dust.

As a metaphor, generations compare to video displays. Each new generation is more efficient and has higher resolution. Younger generations want to be more efficient and light weight. They don’t need to become hippies in order to be irritated with taking the trash out all the time. Because youth build on what the wise began, they see finer details and are therefore concerned about things the old sage could never see. So, judge at the right resolution.

272 – Leading as Enforcers

If we don’t lay down the law and regulate—to paint the lines in the right places and make sure that everyone stays inside those lines—to enforce the good rules that keep everyone safe, whether big or small, young or old—if we let lawlessness have the run of the mill—we do incredible damage.

It’s an old con artist tactic to sit piously, nod with understanding while others talk, show that “sad, sympathetic” face, keep calm and regal, and talk with the ideal, soothing tone that offends no one, all while the foundations crumble and thieves roam unchecked. The incompetent leader uses this tactic, allowing problems to grow while maintaining a vernier of a “pastoral” or “ministerial” or “presidential” or “kingly” manners, and those same problems actually make the people flock to their fraudulent leader who refuses to take action to stop those problems.

True, valuable, competent, worthy leadership will shake the building in order to restore the foundations to the healthy state they began with. Re-roofing, tearing-up carpet, knocking-out and putting-up partitions, digging basements, pouring concrete—construction and maintenance are dusty, dirty, disruptive work.

Of course, the phony, pseudo-pious leader will put out the prophet, slay the truth-teller, and accuse internal compliance inspectors of complaining—all the while mislabeling those activities as “necessary disruptions” when they are anything but.

If you want your life and your work to not become a train wreck, you must know the difference between foundational and theatrical leadership. The foundational leader knows a healthy foundation and enforces rules in order to keep the house in good repair. The theatrical leader does his work in rhetoric and style, politely perched atop a decaying social structure some else created. The mark of a foundational leader is proper enforcement of necessary rules.

When the good leader enforces necessary rules, many people object. Few understand foundation science and no one wants the floor to tremble. But, the very leader deemed the “trouble maker” could be the only person in the house with the competence and courage to save the house. Rules protect the innocent and keep everyone safe under the roof. Question leaders, but don’t complain about thriving steps causing tremors.