Author: watchstandpray

141 – Keep Your Regiment

Diet, exercise, reading, learning, practicing, growing, praying, advancing… Don’t let school exams, big projects, travel, holidays, weather, long recoveries from injury, or other interruptive circumstances knock you off your track. When you have to take a break, remember to get back to work. Make adjustments and keep the vision in your mind.

My father was fit, slim, and ran every day until my mother became pregnant with me. He stopped running and quickly got “furniture disease”—where the chest falls into the drawers.

Don’t pursue romance until you’ve grown up enough to come out the other side an even better person. Have your business or career ready, have money in the bank or some schedule thought through. Many good projects get abandoned because the software developer had a kid or the business had an expensive start and money didn’t come in soon enough. Many children don’t know their fathers who either won’t abandon their pet projects or have to work extra because they weren’t financially ready for kids. People get married or begin a twenty-year job and their priorities change both for better and worse; go into every day expecting that, don’t be ignorant.

Select your priorities to maintain before the unexpected surprises you. Through uphill climbs, hold your standards as high as you can and know that no life worth publishing happens by itself. God is always in control, but don’t let circumstance take you out of the driver’s seat of your diligence. Stand alert at your watch.

When you get off track, don’t wait for your friends to call you; keep yourself in line. “Accountability groups” are useful, but overrated. “Confession circles” are for people just beginning to admit their problems to themselves. Planning with a wingman is a blessing beyond words. Two can achieve the work of five; it’s called “synergy”. But, don’t let so-called “accountability partners” be your excuse to fail. Don’t let “accountability salesmen” tell you that you’ll fail without affirming their egos and buying their books. At times you will be your only wingman—that is one of the steepest uphill climbs. A little self-accountability and intrinsic motivation during easy times will prepare you for summits worth their ascent.

140 – Jesus: Son, Brother & Friend

Jesus was born a member of an immediate family. He had a mother and was raised by Joseph to become a carpenter. He had brothers—James, Joseph, Simon, and Jude—as well as sisters who are not named in the Bible.

Jesus lived as a real person with a real life, but he did not live a sinful life. Jesus was not the son of Joseph—even though those in Nazareth presumed he was. Jesus is, was, and has always been the Son of God.

Raising a family with the Son of God as the firstborn among brothers is not easy, particularly for sinful people. Jesus’s brothers must have been jealous of him at times. Bible teachers and Church tradition presume that Joseph, Mary’s husband, died during the “quiet” years of Jesus’s life—the years not recorded in the Bible. This may have been a grace to the family. It’s not easy to parent a child who runs off to the temple, impresses the teachers, doesn’t tell mom and “dad” where he is, then mouths off, “Surely you should have known I would be about my Father’s business.” For Joseph’s sin—which everyone has—or for his simple sanity, he needed a break from Jesus. We know, however, that Joseph was a “righteous” man because he heeded the angel who told him Mary’s pregnancy was from God and stood by her through the shame of appearing immoral.

With Nazareth presuming Jesus to be the illegitimate son of Joseph, gossip would have spread. Even the brothers would have been scorned. Especially when someone is good and does what is right, an immoral world presumes that everyone sins just as they do. So, they attribute the results of goodness to greater sins. Jesus and his whole family carried this stigma.

Yet, Jesus was a friend. He welcomed children, discipled brats, let John lay on his chest, gave sight to the blind, healed the lame, encouraged those oppressed by the elite, comforted honest Pharisees, and even counseled Pilate before his crucifixion.

On the cross, Jesus declared John his mother’s adoptive son, looking after friends, family, and his mother, as a son and brother, right up to the end.

Matthew 13:55-56; 19:13-15, John 3:1-21; 7:5-10; 19:8-12, 26-27

139 – Deal with the Inside

Trying to advance your position on the social ladder will backfire. Your progress faces two challenges: your faults and your need to grow. Growth comes with strength, which takes exercise, persistence, and time. Faults, however, come from damage that must be mended. If you try to elevate your status without dealing with these two, you will implode.

This actually explains the problems of many flawed leaders, the “head-scratcher” leaders of whom their suffering, subordinating staff ask, “How did this idiot get in charge with so many failing results?” It’s easy so see with a simple glance at what’s under the hood. Such a leader polished the bodywork, but neglected the frame and engine.

So-called “progress” with the social recognition, without growing in character first is only external. There is much more to building a car than buffing old paint.

The problem is temptation. Everyone feels the pressure to keep up with the exterior progress of those around us. It’s often called “peer pressure”. And, interestingly enough, most people paint their facade of “success” because of their neglected faults, usually to get back at a phantom haunting from childhood, if not to simply prove someone wrong.

Don’t be seduced by thirst to keep up with the Joneses; it will drive you to take shortcuts that shouldn’t be taken, receive favors that shouldn’t be given, and make deals at the expense of your soul. Then you will become that leader everyone loathes.

Don’t seek promotions; think thrice before accepting them. Focus on building your character, restoring whatever’s broken, and unloading whatever you’ve been carrying around in your trunk. By striving to be strong, whole, and valuable, that success you were created to desire will come looking for you. And, it will surely find you, once you are strong, solid, and lean enough that you won’t buckle under the pressure.

Success crushes a great many people. Delays may seem like setbacks, but self-destructing because you got too much power faster than you knew what to do with takes a lot more time than slow, foundational growth. Fame and position draw fierce enemies and strange complexities. Some extra time in the garage will make sure you’re ready for it.

138 – Worldview Schools of Thought

If you want to have a strong life, you must draw a line in the sand. In self-improvement, there three main opinions: disdain for the entire topic, people who will take any criticism or hardship to improve themselves, people who want to impose change on the external world and are easily offended.

This book is written for the second category only. If you are in one of the other two categories, you hopefully won’t like this book because it conflicts with your worldview’s DNA.

This book’s approach to self-improvement is to hear-out criticism, search for “inner” strength, and deny yourself the right to claim “victim”, especially if you are one. If you’re not looking for that, don’t read this book.

If you are unhappy with your body, this book advises you to accept yourself from the inside and be physically healthy, not to do plastic surgery or other forms of medical treatment. If people treat you rudely, this book teaches you to find “inner power” to press on with your life, without policing or modifying or making laws to regulate what other people say. If you want want to medically alter your body in order to be emotionally satisfied with your body or if you want to protest about “hate speech”, then this book’s philosophy cannot help you because you seek a different type of “life coaching” opinion.

Know your approach to life. Recognize your mode of operation and put it into words. People have different philosophies about “being better people”, identify which group you fall into and do not judge the specific advice of a worldview you are not a part of.

If you don’t believe in the Bible, don’t critique the hermeneutics or theology of those who do. If you believe in the Bible, don’t criticize the morals or philosophies of those who don’t. If you’re a Republican, don’t criticize the politics of someone who is a Democrat. Learn to say, “We are in different schools of thought,” or, “I’m a Republican, you’re a Democrat,” or, “I don’t believe the Bible, you do,” or, “I deny myself the right to cry victim, even when I am one.” Then you can disagree with dignity.

137 – Fiefdom Dictators & Controlling Spirits

Beware of the strange desire to control, merely for the sake of control. Another “thing” that can get situated onto people is the “controlling spirit”. It might show up as megalomania or meaningless manipulation or creating chaos just for the sake of attention. When people have this controlling “thing” on them, they would be satisfied to have a small corner in the room to control, torture, manipulate, get a reaction out of, get attention from, get a “quarrel fix” with, and entertain themselves with absolute dictatorial powers, merely for the pleasure of the experience.

It tends to gravitate toward leaders of groups that recruit numbers, religious or otherwise, because controlling spirits want to have something to control. Any sensible slight to its pride will set that controlling spirit off its rocker, prove to the host that the problem is real, and, if that host keeps cooperating with it, the host might socially and professionally self-destruct.

Remember, someone with a controlling spirit doesn’t actually hunger for this control. Like a parasite that gives unnatural hunger, the spirit “thing” rests on its host, creating the appetite to act so strangely. Of course, the person must cooperate and welcome the controlling spirit. Simple resistance would make the spirit shrink, lose its size and thus its power, and eventually leave. But, too many people won’t give up that resistance because they somewhat enjoy the feelings the get from carrying a controlling spirit on their backs.

In East Asia it’s such a common problem that Western expats and Asian bloggers write about it. The boss holds numerous meetings merely to “feel like a boss”, makes his office inaccessible, and the solution to “problems” is the same solution to “suggestions”: The boss is the god, everyone else is a cockroach created only to preserve the boss’s godhood. If it’s hard to imagine, ask someone from Asia. But, it is a living, real caricature of the controlling spirit.

If that’s you, quitting your position might make the spirit go away. That actually happens.

If you struggle with a “controlling” person, use these strengths: Be among the hardest working, remain super-calm when the bear gets provoked, and expect insanity because spirits don’t reason.

136 – God the Only Perfect Father

Whatever sin a man has not dealt with in his life, he passes this on to his children at a basic level almost reaching DNA. Permanently and unable to be treated by psychotherapy—possibly personality disorders—these sins will forever persist through the entire lives of his children. The Bible calls this “sins of the fathers” and says they are “visited onto the sons to the third and fourth generation”.

Mothers do not pass on their unresolved sin issues this way, which is part of the counterintuitive strategy of God. Does it make a woman more or less powerful that she cannot injure her children this way? Jesus was sinless for this reason; he had no father, only a mother. So, he had no sin nature in his body, constantly fighting his will and tempting him to sin, even without devils bothering him.

Because of Jesus’s work on the Cross, these “sins of the fathers” can be removed, but only by “forgiving one’s father”. There is a time when everyone must come to grips with this truth: Your father messed up big time. He neglected his responsibilities as a father and as a human in general. You MUST forgive him—that means that you never expect him to apologize and you never seek any repayment or restitution from him at all. Whatever your father did to make your life hard, get the payback and punishment payment from Jesus.

Jesus will pay whatever you lost far more than your father could anyway.

It is that we not “excuse” or “try to understand” their difficulty. As we age we come to understand our parents more and more, but we must never “excuse” their mistakes. Parents are leaders and must have their lives in order before they get involved in romance. There is no excuse for them; parents must instead be forgiven.

“Forgiving” means waving all rights to collect on a debt owed, the opposite of “excusing”. Never confuse them. You won’t need to when you depend on God for whatever perfection we need from a parent. He has it. Accept not only God’s repayment, but also His perfection as a Father who will never let you down.

135 – Evaluate the Logic

If we really believe something is true, would we do what we are doing? It is okay to ask people that question when they accuse you of something absurd. Especially ask yourself this question.

Take the religious zealot who recruits people to his weekly meeting, yet seeks arguments everywhere he goes. Not many religious teach of a God who hates enemies; God’s Word’ God Who wants enemies to repent into a hopeful future. Does a truly religious man truly want to argue? Perhaps he doesn’t truly believe what he claims, one way or another. Perhaps that man is you.

Take the doctor whose patient tells him of home remedy, but that doctor doesn’t seriously think about starting a research article in a medical journal about the home remedy. Does that doctor truly want to heal people or just stick to practicing what he already knows? How about the lawyer addicted to narcotics, drives 30 over the speed limit on a regular basis, trades stock with inside tips, or hides money in offshore accounts to pay near zero tax—does he really seek “justice” in court?

Evaluate your own logic—both what you claim to believe and what you believe about others.

You don’t know why other people do what they do. Someone could seem to confront you, but is actually saving your life. The best policy is patience and to just, plain, simply not judge. You need to prove someone was NOT trying to save your life before you hold a grudge or even “forgive”.

If someone saved your life, that’s not “forgiveable”, that’s “thankable”. To forgive someone without first hearing their side is also a judgment against that other person, which Heaven regards an ongoing judgment against you until you repent of that idea and get your thoughts straight.

Perhaps someone was trying to save your life, merely by punching you in the face to teach you to make peace quicker than make enemies. It may have been the wrong way, but that person might truly care about you deep inside. Talk. Verify. Listen. Check the logic of whatever conclusion you draw. Make sure your opinion is not just some phantom in your mind.